And Now to Write

Remember the joy of having your work displayed on the fridge as a kid? Not only did your parents like what you did, they decided everyone who entered the kitchen should see it, too. Whenever you passed by, you'd look up at it and smile. You did something good - something that is there to be delighted in. From a technical standpoint, most of those things actually weren't all that great. None of my finger paintings could ever compare to the masterpieces of Michelangelo. Nothing about my portraits were perfect: proportions all out of whack, eyes were never level, no one had knees, feet always splayed out. But yet, they were worthy of display. Some of those art pieces are still on display at my parents' house. You know, it's the same with God. When compared to what God can do, the work we offer Him probably resembles the quality of those kid drawings most of the time. So imperfect. But given where we're at, so good. And our heavenly Father doesn't accept thes...

A few years ago, I overheard a conversation in a locker room that has stuck with me. A girl was telling her friend that her mom was fasting for Lent and how she thought fasting was pointless and nonsensical. As the Lenten season comes to a close, I want to address this common sentiment using my own observation and personal experience (not by pointing to Bible verses -- but if you want that, click here ). First, even outside of a religious context, people fast. Take, for one example, the environmental movement’s Meatless Monday. Here, it is seen as a good thing to forgo meat one day per week in order to mitigate that industry's environmental impact. This parallels Catholics’ year-round observance of "meatless Friday," by which we recognize our failings and continual need for mercy and conversion. * Here's another example those of you who don't observe Meatless Mondays might relate to. When preparing for a delicious large meal, many people will skip a meal or e...

This morning, I was thinking a bit about what I would respond if someone who had left the Catholic Church asked me why I choose to stay. While there are a whole bunch of reasons I could give, I would probably focus on two things: the Eucharist and being able to experience God's mercy in Reconciliation. How I could never give up that intimate contact with my beloved. Sitting with that answer, particularly in light of calling the Lord my beloved. In the context of receiving the Eucharist, that is when the Body and Blood of Jesus becomes one with His Church. Two become one flesh. When we eat something, it is literally incorporated into our bodies. 1  In this way, the Divine Bridegroom becomes one with His bride. And, moving along the lines of two becoming one flesh, this union is to bear fruit and bring life into this world that is dying of sin. This is the wedding feast of the lamb - what we call the Mass. In the Eucharist, Jesus gives His Body and Blood to us. He desires to be ...

Well, the new year is upon us! It's a perfect time to reflect on how we've done with our resolutions from last year as we plan new ones for 2020. In that vein, I'm coming full circle with this blog, by revisiting an old topic . Toward the close of 2018, I had chosen my word to focus on for 2019: everything. I wasn't entirely sure what that would mean, but that's what I felt drawn to. While I had spit balled a couple of ideas in that blog post, they only felt like that - sketches of ideas. I had noted that "everything" didn't just mean surrendering everything. It also involved God's presence in every situation, rejoicing in everything, and knowing everything that is good comes from Him. But I didn't quite know where to go with all of that. So, I unknowingly embarked on a mission to answer two questions: Is there something that unifies all of the ways the word "everything" is used in the spiritual life? Is it possible to grow in ...

When encountering a Christian giving a mini testimonial, there are certain phrases you might hear. "Before I knew Christ...," "Before I converted...," "If I hadn't ___, then..." are a couple that come to mind. One time at Mass, one of these types of thoughts came out of nowhere to grab my attention: "If God didn't exist...." It's an interesting phrase. When it's used, the unspoken assumption tends to be that life as we know it would still be, well, as we know it. Maybe a couple specific tweaks depending on the argument, but at its core, the person speaking assumes existence. I know that approach has its place, but what if that thought is followed along the lines of what theists believe. Theists believe that God is the  creator of everything. So, if God didn't exist, nothing would exist. Close your eyes and try picturing that.                                             ...

As many of my close friends know, I have a soft spot for environmental concerns. Growing up, I have memories of my brother trying to insult me by calling me a "tree hugger," to which I would respond by ginning and hugging whatever tree was nearby. Being in nature is one of my happy places. When I would think of my dream home during high school, it always included woods in the backyard or at least within a minute or two's walking distance. One of my answers to "what would you do if you won a million dollars" was to buy a large piece of wooded/marsh land that is being earmarked for development and turn it into a preserve with a nature education center instead. During undergrad my love for nature took on a slightly different form. When I learned the science behind climate change and how maltreatment of the environment often disproportionately impacts the poorest of the poor, my heart was grabbed. Instead of simply enjoying nature and getting upset when another co...

If you grew up in a Jewish or Christian household, you've heard the phrase "keep holy the sabbath" before. For both religions, a big part of this is to not do work on one day of the weekend.  For Jews, this is Saturday; for Christians, this is Sunday (the Lord's Day). For the sake of keeping things easily readable and as accurate as I can write them, I'm going to continue this post from the Christian tradition.   Side note: if the difference in days piques your interest, check out this passage of a book that chronicles the history of the Christian Sunday (and partially inspired this post) or this article . From the outset, this command seems pretty simple. Don't clock in to your job on a Sunday, or if you're a student, don't do your homework on a Sunday. Of course, there are some exceptions like nurses, firemen, police officers, etc. But, for most of us, we aren't exempt from the "no work" command. I know there might not seem to be muc...

A couple months back, a friend lent me a sizable book titled The Coming Plague  that chronicles the journeys of epidemiologists who confronted diseases that were new as of the 20th century. So far, I've read about the discoveries of Lassa, Machupo, and Ebola. Now, I'm exploring various strains of influenza (P.S. Swine flu was/is actually pretty terrifying and now I understand why people were freaking out about it). While reading about this specific virus, a thought struck me: heresy  actually parallels influenza viruses pretty dang well. Before I get into it, I'm going to quote a couple of paragraphs I read that brought about this realization. When the [influenza] virus reproduced itself, the chromosomes had to unwind and make duplicate sets of their proteins and RNA. In the process, parts of one chromosome might overlap with another, extraneous bits of RNA from the cell in which the virus resided might get copied as well, and the whole mess would be reassorted and reass...

It is easy to forget the heavy silence that had existed between the first Good Friday and Easter Sunday.  To limit the sorrows and adoration of the Passion to Friday and focus on the upcoming resurrection after Friday's service.  In doing so, we inadvertently skip over the fact that God let Jesus lay in the tomb for a full day and a half.  For a day and a half, God was utterly silent.  For a day and a half, darkness appeared to have won.  We often meditate on Christ dying, but rarely sit with Christ's death.   In response, I wanted to write a reflection of both.  I'll be drawing from three different sources whose links can be found at the bottom of this post. Sitting in the Silence What had I done before the silence?  My God sweat blood out of anxiety and anguish knowing one of his own would soon betray him.  That I, a trusted friend, decided maybe  $90, $200,  or  $3,000 was worth ending his transformative min...

In my senior year of high school, my AP English teacher had our class fill out a personal inventory. It's filled with various questions about life experiences, how you approach the world, and creative hypotheticals.  Every once in a while, I return to that series of questions and answer them all again to see what's changed and what has stayed the same despite multiple years passing.  Looking it over again, a question about irrational fears made led me to ponder another question: "What is your biggest fear?"  Thinking back to previous conversations I've had, I know I would have often responded, "Somehow missing my life's purpose." Being a Christian, I believe God has given me this specific life at this specific point in time for a reason.  The trick is trying to figure out and live out that reason.  For some, God placed a very strong desire in their heart early on, making it fairly clear the path they should take.  I do not consider myself one of th...

As I mentioned last time , when I think of Christian unity in action right now, I think of bringing people to accept Christ as their Savior and growing where we have common ground.  However, I also mentioned my growing awareness of denominational differences.  I have heard from various places that denominations shouldn't/don't matter, but that ignores why they exist.  Different denominations have different ideas of what truth is.  They have different responses to tradition and Bible passages, even so far as not accepting passages from Daniel and Esther and relegating other books to an appendix, if they are included at all.  There are different definitions and approaches to central concepts like grace, sacraments, and justification.  Our differences matter. I love my Protestant brothers and sisters and have learned much from them, but I still believe the Catholic Church is where fullness of grace and truth are found.  Protestant denominations have b...

In my last blog , I had mentioned having "Catholic" and "daughter of God" bubbles in my identity Venn Diagram - the former living inside the latter.  Having both bubbles is important to me because my family and many of my religious experiences are interdenominational.  However, my struggle within the Venn Diagram project, and a good chunk of my life, was determining how I treat those two aspects of my identity in relation to each other.  What it looks like to claim the identity of "Catholic Christian" versus simply "Catholic."  During high school, I started by trying to understand what it means to be a Christian.  In undergrad, my pursuit shifted to me deepening my understanding of Catholicism.  It was during this time that I also became aware of divisions I had been blind to most of my life. It was within this journey that I volunteered to talk at the Christian Unity Prayer Service being held by my Newman Center and the University Lutheran C...

Around this time of year, it's pretty common to hear people talk about their New Year's resolutions.  What they are, how they've already fallen short but are trying again, how long they think the resolutions will actually last, etc.  And then there's the group of people who boycott New Year's resolutions because of how they rarely make it past the one month mark.  I guess you could say I'm half-boycotter and half-resolutionist (sure, that can be a word).  Instead of choosing a goal like "exercise five times a week" or "wake up at 6:30 every morning," I choose a word to focus on for the year.  For example, the first year I did this I chose "humility" with the intent of growing in that virtue.  This year, my word is "everything." I know, it's an odd choice that sounds extremely vague.  The idea came to me while reading and reflecting on an Advent devotional centered on Mary.  While the devotional definitely emphasized...

Ever since I was in high school, mission trips have been a part of my life.  I participated in home repair trips, community service trips, and an international mission.  One summer, I chose to work for the organization that did so much to spur on my faith and ran a mission trip site with two other people.  Motivated by this and knowing I was going into public health, I also took a class last year that critically looked at humanitarianism.  So when a friend of mine recently questioned how much good they actually do, I felt like I was just the person to give an answer.  But, as per usual, I did a mediocre job at best trying to explain that on the spot with limited time. So, I want to try to do a better job of it now. Having had so many different experiences within the realm of mission trips, I have seen plenty of great and not so great things.  I read many of the articles circulating social media a couple years ago that denounced and challenged mission tri...

I know I'm a little late, but I want to recognize Mental Health Awareness week. The purpose of this week is to educate and increase awareness of mental illness. So, I want to do my part. I've had my own battles with mental illness. Specifically, I have a history of depression and anxiety. The first time I suffered from depression was my freshman year of high school. However, I was never officially diagnosed and never went to a counselor for it. Stressors seemed to continuously pile on. Transitioning into high school meant playing less sports I loved and being surrounded by more people who were better than me in areas I had previously been a top performer in. Adding to this, I felt an increasing distance between me and my grade school friend circle. As we all started making new friends, I noticed how I increasingly heard names everyone but me recognized and shared stories about. To cap it off, my grandpa was diagnosed with and quickly died from pancreatic cancer. Once h...

When I was in Italy, I took a sustainable foods class that often left me thinking along tangents. In this class, we talked about all aspects of the food system: growth and production, distribution, preparation, consumption, waste. Between this course and my cooking classes, I really began to think about what I eat and what that means for my body. After all, "we are what we eat." One morning after class, I went to News Cafe to work on some Italian homework that was due in a couple hours. But, as what often happens when I get a sugary espresso drink, my mind wandered down a rabbit hole instead. The light was coming through the windows and hitting my moccacino in such a way that it sparked by caffeinated brain to think about light, food, and faith. Since my mind doesn't actually process things well internally on caffeine and sugar, I wrote it all down in my notebook.  Enjoy. Reflections on Light We need energy from sunlight to live, but can only ...

This is the shirt. And yes, I have troubles knowing how to pose for photos. Back in high school, I went on mission trips with a group of teens from my parish.  Every Workcamp, we got a t-shirt with the week's theme on it.  I have developed quite the collection: Undeserved, Connect, Made, and What Do You Stand For.  The last one has resulted in the most attention.  Walking around in public with "What Do You Stand For?" in big letters across my chest often prompts people to ask me that very question. Starting from when I was 17 years old, I have been working on an answer.  I knew responding with "oh, that was just the theme from a mission trip I went on" was not good enough.  It didn't actually answer the question.  Sometimes, people would respond with their own answers.  This happened if a little kid or someone with Downs Syndrome asked or were nearby.  They would say something to the tune of "puppies!" or "homeless kittens!"...

One of the things I think about fairly often is how many people are struggling with feeling lost to themselves.  Who feel like they need to find themselves.  Who wonder what it is like to love themselves.  I think about this because I only briefly experienced it myself, and I want people to be free of these feelings. I think about how there's a departure at some point.  As kids, we don't ask these questions.  The idea of not knowing who you are feels absurd because you just are.  But then other thoughts creep in, whether they're from classmates, teachers, family members, friends.  We develop insecurities and lose ourselves.  Some earlier than others.  I met this battle head on my first year of high school when I felt a growing distance between my core friend group and myself.  Thankfully, a year later I was able to work through it and return to loving my authentic self.  Insecurities still exist, but I don't give them the power ...