Counting Stars
Looking up at the night sky has always filled me with wonder. When I was in kindergarten, I dreamed of becoming an astronaut and constantly sought out books about space when I was able to read. My favorite memories of vacations up north with my dad's side of the family are of stargazing on the docks. Looking for shooting stars. Hearing stories and thoughts from relatives that normally didn't surface. A feeling of peace and connectedness always filled those moments.
The night sky reminds me of the vastness of the world we live in. Even with the simple speckles of light among the darkness of the sky, an element of wonder emerges. It fills my heart with the yearning for discovery. Excitement about what is unknown, but right in front of me. How we can't even see all of the stars in the sky, but we know they're there.
I think of how small and gentle stars look when they are actually giant and full of fire. It is an echo of the human soul. So much being contained in one being that even the person themselves does not fully understand themselves. A person can be quiet and reserved when seen from a distance, but have a fire burning within them that isn't seen until you get close. How small we really are among everyone who exists and ever has existed, but how much we mean to those around us.
But even more so, I marvel at how some of the stars we see aren't even there, yet their light still reaches us on Earth. They are gone, but their presence remains. They continue to brighten the darkness. Even when it technically engulfed where the star previously was, the light shines through as bright as before. It is all so beautiful to me.
It surprised me when I first heard a friend say thinking about stars, looking into the night sky, scared her. How it made her feel so small and insignificant. The bigness of it all being overwhelming. It surprised me because this is the key to my awe and peace. Remembering the smallness and temporality of my life. It reminds me to not worry too much. That I am part of a larger, more permanent picture which I can only see part of. It breathes adventure and excitement to see how my life fits in with those around me.
The only time I didn't feel all of this was when I studied abroad. There was one night toward the end of the semester when I was feeling homesick, and I remembered a quote about seeing the same moon wherever you are. Looking up, I realized none of the stars were the same, and I became more deflated. The usual harmony I felt was lost because the sky that had always been nearly the same was completely different. My sky wasn't shared with family and friends back home. For the first time, I couldn't bear to look at the night sky.
Since I've returned, I always stop to look at the stars when I find myself outside at night. Let my excitement grow with each star I can see. Smile as I find the Big Dipper - the only constellation I know how to identify. Lay on a roof or in the grass, laughing about life or having deep conversations with people I love. Or slip into my own head for a while and think about life's beautiful paradoxes, taking in the wonderful moment I find myself in. Praising God for the beautiful adventure that is life.
The night sky reminds me of the vastness of the world we live in. Even with the simple speckles of light among the darkness of the sky, an element of wonder emerges. It fills my heart with the yearning for discovery. Excitement about what is unknown, but right in front of me. How we can't even see all of the stars in the sky, but we know they're there.
I think of how small and gentle stars look when they are actually giant and full of fire. It is an echo of the human soul. So much being contained in one being that even the person themselves does not fully understand themselves. A person can be quiet and reserved when seen from a distance, but have a fire burning within them that isn't seen until you get close. How small we really are among everyone who exists and ever has existed, but how much we mean to those around us.
But even more so, I marvel at how some of the stars we see aren't even there, yet their light still reaches us on Earth. They are gone, but their presence remains. They continue to brighten the darkness. Even when it technically engulfed where the star previously was, the light shines through as bright as before. It is all so beautiful to me.
It surprised me when I first heard a friend say thinking about stars, looking into the night sky, scared her. How it made her feel so small and insignificant. The bigness of it all being overwhelming. It surprised me because this is the key to my awe and peace. Remembering the smallness and temporality of my life. It reminds me to not worry too much. That I am part of a larger, more permanent picture which I can only see part of. It breathes adventure and excitement to see how my life fits in with those around me.
Since I've returned, I always stop to look at the stars when I find myself outside at night. Let my excitement grow with each star I can see. Smile as I find the Big Dipper - the only constellation I know how to identify. Lay on a roof or in the grass, laughing about life or having deep conversations with people I love. Or slip into my own head for a while and think about life's beautiful paradoxes, taking in the wonderful moment I find myself in. Praising God for the beautiful adventure that is life.
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